How to Know If Your Girlfriend Has Moved On Permanently

“My “Girlfriend Dumped Me” has to be one of the top ranked worst things for a guy to say. If that is the point where you find yourself at right now. Apply yourself. Since it is not 100% sure that it is in the past yet.

There are a lot of reasons for which your lover may have turned her back on you.

Most of the time these are not the reasons she is giving you for breaking up with you. Probes indicate that many females don't really distinguish why the relationship has ended. And often, the situation can still be rescued. As long as you don't create more 'relationship damage' when she dumps you.

Lamentably, it has to be said, a lot of men contaminate the relationship beyond repair when their girlfriend splits up with them. But that is a theme for another column…

So, how do you recognize if the split is for keeps?

You don't need to examine why the relationship didn't have a chance. You need to consider the 'status of the relationship' itself.

Let me give you some quick pointers on how to do this. This takes some reckoning on your part, to look past the small details and what she states. The prize will be that you have complete clarity of the status of your bond. No matter what she is saying to you, or how it looks, you will be aware of the reality of the situation.

We will review the relationship from three angles: gravitation, gospel truth and honor.

If you have lost either one of these irrecoverably, then you won't be able to recover from the separation in any rational way. You could recapture the magic briefly, but this is basically putting off the eventual end. Ok, let's dig deeper into each of these.

Enthrallment: Is your former lover still enthralled by you?

Signs of attraction include any of the following:

• Flirting with you
• Looking happy to see you when she does
• Accidentally bumping into you or turning up to places where you are
• Keeping track of and posting on your facebook
• Did she leave you for another guy?
• Did she fleece you?

Hint: For the last two on the list you have an 'attraction' problem.

Reliance: Does your former sweetheart still rely on you?

Did any of the following happen:

• She discovered you were cheating on her (and lying about it)
• You told others some private information about her that was intimate and she found out
• She was insecure about something important to her and you ridiculed her or were condescending about it
• She needed your support and you were too busy or just completely disacknowledged it
• In an argument you said things that couldn't be taken back (e.g. calling her names, or judging her negatively)

Hint: All of the situations above are very damaging to the trust in your relationship.

Does she still do any of the following:

• Confide in you about intimate and personal things
• Talk to you about the relationship between you openly
• Talk about her feelings openly with you

Hint: If she still does these then she still trusts you on some level.

Appreciation: Does your former lover appreciate you?

Have you noticed any of the following:

• She makes fun of or ridicules you in front of other people
• She dismisses things you say
• She asks for your advice about things
• She brags about you or talks up the things you have done to other people
• She talks about you in a condescending way to others

To make it easy for yourself give each of the above factors (attraction, trust and respect) a rating out of 10. Take magnetism as an illustration. You can give it a 10, if she is still really enchanted with you. If she finds you totally disgusting then you know what to do. Give it the big zilch.

If your unemotional ratings are 7 or more for each of these, then you have an opportunity. More importantly, you can take a shot. You can pick up with the affair where you left off and rebuild it into something that will last for a long time. You need to chill out, and ease back into the liaison. Oftentimes moderately. And you need to let things chill out, especially the concerns before you take it back in that direction.

I wish for you to find yourself in the above situation. But please be painfully forthright with yourself. You will only harm yourself if you bamboozle yourself about the situation and don't face the truth.

If whichever one of your objective ratings are below 7 then your relationship has undergone some damage, from which it will likely never recover. The most outstanding hint I can supply you with, is to start moving on with your life right away.

It is important to start to get over a break upas soon as you understand that your relationship is not recoverable.